A Step into Freedom
Your support of Community Pregnancy Clinics is setting thousands of women free across the state of Florida. Free from abortion. Free from despair. Free from isolation. Last year, 2,070 women were served with care, compassion, and choices by CPCI’s professional medical staff because of you. Read the story below of one of these women whose life was changed after encountering CPCI outside Planned Parenthood.
Positive. Staring at those two pink lines, my mind began to race. I can’t do this. I can’t do this. I can’t do this. Putting my face in my hands and my back to the wall, I slid down to sit on the cold bathroom floor. I can’t care for another child. I looked at the test again. Maybe I saw it wrong. But even through my blurred vision, those two pink lines were undeniably there. Our finances are already so strained. There’s no way we could make this work. Suddenly, I heard the muffled laughter and screams of our kids’ playing in the other room. What will my husband think? After twelve years of marriage, we both have been working so hard, constantly worried about providing for our four children. We don’t talk about the stress, but it affects us.
I reached up and grabbed my phone by the sink. This can all go away. I wiped the tears streaming down my face and typed Planned Parenthood into Google. An abortion can make this all go away. A minute later, I had an appointment scheduled. I didn’t want to have an abortion, but I felt like it was my only choice. A few days later, hardly able to think clearly, I got into my car to drive to Planned Parenthood. My mind raced and stomach tightened as I got closer. I love my children, but I can’t care for another one.
As I pulled into the parking lot, I saw a group of people standing outside. One of their signs read “we can help you.” They looked nice, but I wasn’t sure how anyone could help me right now. I felt so alone. Too ashamed to look any of them in the eye, I got out of my car and walked by the group with my head down. I opened the door to Planned Parenthood and stepped inside. Suddenly, a chill went up my spine, and I couldn’t take another step forward. I am about to kill my child. With tears streaming down my face, I turned around. Shaking uncontrollably, I reached for the door. I didn’t know it at the time, but that was a step into freedom.
One of the women from the group came up to me. And I am so grateful she did. I don’t remember exactly what she said, but I remember her gentleness. She knew I needed help, and I wanted to be helped. She kindly guided me across the street to which she explained was a local pregnancy center’s mobile unit that had free services. I stepped inside and was greeted by a kind nurse who sat me down on a couch and comforted me as I tried to stop shaking. I had never met these women before, but I felt safe.
The nurse listened as I explained through tears how my husband and I have been struggling with our finances and providing for our four children. I can’t even wrap my head around the thought of having another child. I don’t know if it’s even possible. All I know is that I couldn’t take another step into that building. The nurse listened and nodded along. It felt so good to get out of my head that had been spinning for days and say this out loud. I felt heard. And not only did I feel heard, but the nurse also helped me realize that caring for another child was possible. The nurse shared with me about a variety of financial resources that could help our family’s situation. I felt like I could breathe again.
The nurse leaned forward. “Do you want to see your baby?” she asked. Yeah, I do. In just a few minutes, I was staring at my little baby’s heart beating on the screen. My little baby. I burst into tears realizing that I was just moments away from killing my own child who I could now see so clearly. How could I have ever done that? I asked the nurse. The shame overwhelmed me. “You walked in there, but you also had the courage to walk out,” the nurse said. There was no judgement, just love.
We scheduled a follow-up ultrasound, so my husband could see our little baby growing inside of me. I had gone to that mobile unit in a shadow of shame, and I left in the light of life. I am so grateful.
If you want to make more stories like this possible, join the CPCI family and make a donation today. Your support of our non profit medical clinic is saving lives in Naples, Fort Myers, Sarasota, and Gainesville and transforming the culture of death into a culture of life.